


come on baby (don't say maybe)

by orphan_account



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, road trip au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 11:09:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/798035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s the kind of summer where he wants to do nothing but spend every moment with Louis, and maybe that’s how he sees the rest of his life too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	come on baby (don't say maybe)

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on LJ, but I figured I should just start moving things on to AO3 as well. It's a bit slow, and more atmosphere driven than event driven, or at least that was my intention with this. Any feedback is appreciated!

_University._  
  
  
The thought hits Zayn like a ton of bricks after graduation, and he can’t feel more down about it if he tried. It’s not that he’s happy to be stuck in this little town, because no, he’s really not. It’s not even that he’s scared of it, because he’s really not. He’s had university planned since he was a junior. He’s going to major in English, maybe minor in art, and he’s going to be a teacher. Life sorted, future settled, and all it takes is four years of hard work. No problem there.  
  
  
No, what scares Zayn is that he’s going to have to do this alone. Him and Louis have done everything together since they were in diapers. They learned to ride bikes together when they were five, they used to build blanket forts together at eight, and then when they were ten, they both tried out for the school soccer team together. At fourteen, it was going to their first dance together which they both took their first girlfriends, which eventually led to their first break ups and the usual teenage angst that follows. It’s a comfort thing for Zayn, and if Louis does something, surely it’s not so bad, and therefore he follows. But now, it’s different. Zayn is going to Boston to study, and Louis is heading to New York.  
  
  
“We need to do something this summer.” Louis tells him at their graduation after party. “Maybe a road trip, across the country and then a flight back.”  
  
  
Zayn considers this for a moment. It’s not a  _bad_ idea, but he’s not sure. He knows a lot of kids plan road trips before college starts, and more often than not, come home fighting with their friends. Not that he actually thinks that they would ever fight. “It could be an absolute disaster.”  
  
  
“Exactly.” Louis laughs, eyes twinkling. “It could be a complete mess, and we could get lost, but it could be fun.”  
  
  
“You and me on the open road.” Zayn laughs, looking around to make sure his mother isn’t around before lighting a cigarette. “There’s no  _could_ there, we’ll definitely get lost.”  
  
  
Louis grins, “Then we’ll explore – come on Zayn, it’s our last summer before college.”  
  
  
Louis pouts and Zayn groans. If Zayn has learned anything in his eighteen years of existence, it’s that he really can’t say no to Louis. “I hate you sometimes.”  
  
  
“You totally adore me.” Louis smirks. Zayn wants to slap him because he knows that look – Louis knows he’s won.  
  
  
Zayn rolls his eyes. “Piss off. The only reason I’m doing this is because college is gonna suck, so might as well fit in something fun before then.”  
  
  
“Whatever you say, bro.” Louis laughs, pinching Zayn’s cheek, and Zayn slaps his hand away.  
  
  
~

 

 

Zayn packs everything he can think of into a duffle bag the night before they plan on leaving. He’s not sure how long Louis wants to spend travelling, and he’s certainly not sure how long it’ll take to travel across the country and back, but he wants to be safe. So, he packs everything. His mother checks on him a few times, and reminds him of things that he could have forgotten (“Did you pack toothpaste _,_ Zayn. I know you packed your brush but what are you going to brush with?” “Oh, shit, yeah I forgot.” “Language, mister.”)  
  
  
Louis pulls up to his house at six in the morning, and he’s driving an Impala. Zayn quirks an eyebrow, “Where’d you get the car?”  
  
  
“My mom.” Louis tells him, helping Zayn load everything into the trunk. Zayn doesn’t say anything, and instead just stares at Louis. In all the years he’s known Jay Tomlinson, she has never driven an Impala. Louis explains, “She owned it in the seventies and forgot she still had the lease for it.”  
  
  
Zayn blinks. “How does someone forget that they owned a car?”  
  
  
“It was with my  _father_  all this time.” Louis tells him after a moment, voice small.  
  
  
Zayn drops the subject. There’s are very few things that are off-limits for them to discuss, and they can talk about anything with each other, which is why the few things that they won’t are left just that – unsaid things. Louis’s father is one of those things. Instead Zayn says, “You really could have let me get a couple hours more sleep – I need my beauty sleep, you know.”  
  
  
Louis rolls his eyes. “You look fine. Besides, I’m the one driving, you’ll probably fall asleep in fifteen minutes flat.”  
  
  
“Probably.” Zayn laughs because it’s true.  
  
  
Louis lays out maps on the hood of the car, with different routes designated with different colored lines. Zayn briefly wonders how long Louis has been planning this trip. Louis points out one of the lines before explaining, “They call that the Oregon Trail, which I know you remember from history because I copied your answers on that test. Basically we’d have to drive a bit north from here to Boston before starting from the Cape and going west.”  
  
  
Zayn blinks. It’s too early to think about this. Louis, for all his spontaneity, is still annoyingly meticulous when it comes to planning. “What can we see on that route?”  
  
  
“Niagara Falls, Yellowstone, a couple of Native American reservations, and mountains.” Louis runs off, looking at his phone. Zayn figures there’s a list there.  
  
  
The options don’t seem that bad, but Zayn wants to be sure. “What are our other options?”  
  
  
“Let’s see, we could take Route 66. It’s the haunted route.” Louis looks at the map, tracing a purple line. “We’d drive north for a bit and then west before catching that. Judging from what I looked up, it’s straight out of a Steinbeck novel.”  
  
  
Zayn likes Steinbeck. There’s something about the way he completely dissects the American Dream that gets to him, but he’s not about to get into that. “I like Steinbeck.”  
  
  
“I know.” Louis says, going back to the map. He points at a yellow line. “This one is my favorite though. It’s called the loneliest road.”  
  
  
Zayn makes a face. “Why would you want a follow a route that sounds so hopeless?”  
  
  
“Because it fits us, in a way.” Louis says, as if that explains everything. When Zayn doesn’t reply, he laughs. “Because, you idiot, lonely routes are straight out of hipster novels.  You know, small towns and cafes and beautiful landscapes. I’d take pictures of those and you can draw them or write about them, since that’s basically what we’re going to college for anyways.”  
  
  
Zayn has to admit that sounds appealing. “Fine, we’ll take that.”  
  
  
~  
  
  
What most people don’t realize about road trips is that, for the most part, it’s  _boring_. Just long stretches on highways before you get out into the country side. There’s traffic, and Louis gets impatient often – honking and using words most sailors wouldn’t dare touch. But Zayn has to admit that once they get out into the country, it’s relaxing. He doesn’t need to worry about school anymore, or about college starting. He doesn’t worry about having to clean his room, or finish his homework. He doesn’t have to babysit his sisters, and he doesn’t have to help his mother run errands. All he has to do is watch the road, and make sure Louis’s rash driving doesn’t kill them both.

  
  
Zayn doesn’t know when he falls asleep, but he wakes up to  _Hotel California_ playing on the radio and Louis humming along to the tune. Zayn blinks, “How long was I gone for?”  
  
  
“An hour.” Louis tells him, before shuffling to hand him a drink from Starbucks. “It’s a white chocolate mocha from the last Starbucks. God knows when we’ll hit another town, so I left you some.”  
  
  
Zayn takes a drink from it. He sighs, voice still heavy with sleep, “Thanks. Anything happen while I was asleep?”  
  
  
“I ran over a raccoon I think.” Louis says, tapping the steering wheel.  
  
  
Zayn blinks. “Only you would say something like that so easily.”  
  
  
“Are you calling me a sadist?” Louis asks, teasingly. Zayn laughs, spitting his drink out and then quickly tries to cover it before Louis can see, but they’re trapped in a small car and there’s no way he would miss it. Louis glances at him, “You’re cleaning that up, you know that right?”  
  
  
The song changes and Louis hums along to that. Zayn thinks that he likes this. It’s peaceful, and Louis humming feels melodic, and Zayn can feel himself relaxing into his seat and nothing seems to bother him anymore. The landscape changes from the busy city highway of Annapolis to the deserted roads on the way to Washington DC. Zayn thinks he can get lost in the grey skies, but it’ll be a good kind of lost -  you know, the kind poems are written about.  
  
  
“Zayn?” Louis asks, after a moment. Zayn just hums, signaling that he’s still awake and listening. “Having fun yet?”  
  
  
Zayn smiles. “This could still be a disaster, but yeah, it's not all bad.”  
  
  
Louis just grins at him before focusing on the road. They pull over at a service station right outside Washington DC, and Zayn moves to the back seat, and Louis follows him. It’s not comfortable, but they manage to find a position that’s relatively bareable so they can get some sleep. Louis’s head is in Zayn’s lap, and almost instinctively, Zayn runs his hands through the other man’s hair, as they drift off to bed.  
  
  
~  
  
  
They don’t stop in Washington DC, though. Louis calls it a boring place where the obscenely rich use their power to make everyone else miserable. Zayn would have argued it, but he still remembers being bored out of his mind when his parents took him there when he was four, so they skip the city and head west. The landscape changes from the city to the mountains as they get closer to the Appalachians.

  
  
Zayn takes over driving duties from Louis, who sits in the back seat singing along to Fleetwood Mac. Zayn is the only one who is ever allowed to hear Louis sing, and while Zayn feels special about that, he really does wish Louis would show other people how talented he really is.  
  
  
“Check that out.” Louis says from the back suddenly. “That looks like a moose.”  
  
  
Zayn turns to look out the window and what looks like a statue of a giant cow. “That’s totally a cow.”  
  
  
“Don’t cows have spots?” Louis retorts.  
  
  
Zayn sticks his tongue out. “Maybe it’s mutated.”  
  
  
“You’re a loser.”  
  
  
“Yeah, well, if I’m a loser then that makes you one by association.”  
  
  
Louis laughs before going back to singing along to Stevie’s parts in  _Go Your Own Way,_ while Zayn covers Lindsey’s. A part of him feels sad about their makeshift duet, because although they’re not going through a bad break up like Stevie and Lindsey did, they really are going their own way after the summer is over, and Zayn isn’t sure how he’ll handle that. One thing is for sure, he’ll miss the constant teasing. Nobody could make insults sound like compliments like Louis does.  
  
  
~  
  
  
“You did  _what_?”

  
  
“It’s that stupid, fucking squirrel’s fault.”  
  
  
Zayn groans. Apparently a squirrel had run on to the road while Louis was driving, and Louis swerved to the side, only to get a flat tire in the process. Zayn doesn’t know how that would work out, but he’s really too annoyed to care. He looks around to see if there’s a service station, but all he could spot in the dark was a motel. “You stay here while I go check if there’s anyone in there.”  
  
  
“Oh, hell no you’re not going there alone.” Louis tells him, hanging on to Zayn’s sleeve. "It could be dangerous."  
  
  
Zayn looks at Louis’s arm, and smirks. “Are you sure you don’t want me to leave  _you_ alone here?”  
  
  
“There’s probably bears in the woods.” Louis shrugs, letting go of his shoulder. “They might want to eat me or something.”  
  
  
Zayn rolls his eyes. “That’s because you look positively delicious.”  
  
  
“You can’t have a piece of me.” Louis smirks.  
  
  
Zayn laughs, “Better me than the bears, though.”  
  
  
The motel owner tells them that he can get someone to fix up their car in the morning, as it’s too late to do anything about it now. They decide to rent a room, with the only available one being a single. It doesn’t matter though, since after eighteen years, personal space literally means nothing anymore. The only problem Zayn has with sharing a bed with Louis is that the other man rolls around a lot, but that problem is fixed when Zayn places an arm around Louis’s waist to keep him still. He briefly wonders how this looks to anyone that doesn’t know how they are, but decides that he really doesn’t care.  
  
  
~  
  
  
They’re back on the road when their car gets fixed, and the first major city they hit in Cincinnati. They don’t stop though. Somewhere along the line, they make a pact to not stop at any major city until they get to San Francisco. In hindsight, Zayn thinks it was Louis’s idea because he much prefers to visit some of the cities en route.

  
  
The scenery changes to plains, and for long stretches, Zayn can’t see anything but open prairies. They would stop a few times – either to pee in bushes, much to Zayn’s displeasure or to just hang out and enjoy the scenery. Zayn would smoke while Louis would take pictures with his polaroid camera. He’d show them to Zayn after, and if Zayn likes something, he’ll sketch it on a notepad. This is really the life Zayn wanted growing up – the kind of life where he doesn’t really have to work, and all he needs is a cigarette, his best friend, a sketchpad, and some good music. It’s the dream a lot of young people have, he thinks. He’s just lucky to be able to do it now, even if it’s for one summer.  
  
  
They stop for gas at a small town about fifty miles from Louisville, and decide to stay the night. After sleeping in the car for well over a week, Zayn’s back is seriously close to giving out. They find a little bed and breakfast that isn’t ridiculously expensive, and sleep.  
  
  
The woman who owns the bed and breakfast has a daughter named Belle. Zayn thinks she’s beautiful with big brown eyes, and he tells Louis this the next morning. Naturally, this earns him an eyeroll and a sarcastic  _can’t you pick someone with less boobs and more abs to discuss with me_. Of course, a cruel twist of fate would have Belle taken with Louis almost immediately. She giggles when she hands them their pancakes, and her hand lingers on Louis’s shoulder a little longer than it probably needs to. She twirls a strand of her hair while she asks them about their road trip. Louis spends more time making sarcastic remarks, but she just laughs anyway (so does Zayn, but he’s always done that so it doesn’t count anymore.)  
  
  
“Thanks, sweetheart.” Louis tells her when she gives them their check. He hugs her, and Zayn quirks an eyebrow. When she leaves, Louis turns to him. He exasperates, “What? You thought she was hot, and it did save us a good five bucks off this bill.”  
  
  
Zayn eyes the bill, and Louis is right. They did save a little bit by just talking to Belle. Zayn smirks, “I bet her brother, if she has one, is more your taste.”  
  
  
“Definitely.” Louis agrees, getting up from the table. Zayn follows him out. Louis continues, as they get to the car. “But my heart is taken so the poor guy doesn’t have a chance.”  
  
  
Zayn stops in his tracks. “Wait,  _what?_ ”  
  
  
~  
  
  
“You can’t just leave me hanging after dropping a bombshell like that.” Zayn whines as he drives, while Louis changes the radio station to something with less static.

  
  
Louis settles on a country station. “Can you drop this? We’ve been talking about it for well over an hour.”  
  
  
“No, we can’t drop this.” Zayn snaps, as Garth Brooks croons some song about a river or something over the radio. Zayn isn’t sure why he cares so much about who Louis likes, but he does. “Can I just guess and you tell me if I’m right?”  
  
  
Louis doesn’t say anything for a long time, and Zayn thinks he should just drop it, but then Louis says, “Alright but on two conditions, I’m not telling you if you’re getting closer and you better not freak out after.”  
  
  
Zayn thinks for a moment. “Is it Harry Styles? I know you guys were both on the soccer team together and there were rumors, and I was going to ask you but then figured you would probably tell me if there was something there but then you’re acting like this and I guess maybe you won’t, and I know I can always ask Harry because we’re friends but really, that’s even more awkward and…”  
  
  
“…fucks sake, shut up Zayn.” Louis cuts off his rambling. “It’s not Harry, although I think he knows who it is.”  
  
  
“Wait, you told Harry and not me?” Zayn doesn’t know why this hurts so much.  
  
  
Louis rolls his eyes. “Of course not. He just figured it out with how much I talk about this guy.”  
  
  
“Hmm.” Zayn muses. He thinks of all the people Louis talks about often, excluding himself, of course. “Is it Niall? Really, I like Niall. He’s friendly and I guess he’s cute and small. He’s probably smaller than you.”  
  
  
Louis groans. “Stop making fun of my height.”  
  
  
“It’s not my fault you’re vertically challenged.” Zayn points out. “So is it Niall? Because I totally approve.”  
  
  
“I don’t need your fucking approval, but no, it’s not Niall.” Louis shakes his head. “And it’s not my fault you’re horizontally challenged – seriously do you even eat anymore?”  
  
  
Zayn ignores him and asks, “Was he in our graduation class - do I like him?”  
  
  
“Yes to the first.” Louis says, and then pauses. “Sometimes for the second.”  
  
  
Zayn considers this. “Is it Liam – wait no, I like Liam. Is it Ed – no, no I like him too. Oh, please tell me it’s not Nathan Sykes.”  
  
  
“No, it’s not.” Louis laughs. “Are you gonna give up yet?”  
  
  
Zayn thinks for a moment, trying to remember everyone in high school but gives up. He doesn’t say anything for a moment, and Louis goes back to playing with the radio. Zayn sighs, “Will you tell me, eventually?”  
  
  
“Yeah, hopefully.” Louis tells him simply.  
  
  
 _Hopefully._ Zayn glances at Louis, meeting his gaze. “You know you can tell me anything, right?” Louis nods but doesn’t say anything. “So why say hopefully?”  
  
  
Louis shrugs. “Maybe I’ll move on by the time I actually tell you.”  
  
  
Zayn doesn’t know what that means, but he knows Louis’s tone. It’s significant, he just can’t seem to figure out why.  
  
  
~  
  
  
Windmills are popular in the Great Plains and they all look the same so Zayn finds himself wondering if they are passing by the same area over and over. They stop by an abandoned railroad track, with a water tower in the backdrop right next to another windmill that looks exactly like the one right outside St. Louis. Zayn takes his sketchpad out again, and Louis takes out his camera.

  
  
“You like this?” Louis comes up to Zayn, who is lounging under a tree drawing something, and hands him a polaroid picture.  
  
  
It’s a picture of the windmill and Zayn groans. “You know they’ve been annoying me.”  
  
  
“Yeah, I know. That’s why I took it for you.” Louis smirks and Zayn ruffles his hair. Louis looks over his shoulder at Zayn’s sketchpad. “What are you drawing?”  
  
  
Zayn shows him a picture of Louis near the railway track. “You.”  
  
  
“I’m flattered.” Louis laughs, taking his sketchpad and looking at it closer. “You clearly think I’m better looking than I actually am – look at those cheekbones.”  
  
  
Zayn doesn’t know why he flushes. “You’re not bad looking, dude.”  
  
  
“From you, I’d almost take that as a compliment.” Louis laughs, giving him his sketchpad back. “Do you need me to go back modeling or are you done?”  
  
  
Zayn fixes up the eye area of his drawing and smiles. It really did come out nice, but that’s not hard to do when it’s Louis that he’s drawing. “I think I’m done.”  
  
  
“Can I have it?” Louis asks after a moment. “You know – to remember you when I get to college.”  
  
  
Zayn laughs as he tears the picture out. “Like you’d ever forget me.”  
  
  
“No.” Louis admits after a moment. “That’s pretty much impossible.”  
  
  
Zayn checks his watch and it’s getting close to seven in the evening. Surely they should get going, and use the last hours of daylight to head to the next service station, but Zayn doesn’t feel like moving. He likes this. The comfort of just being with his best mate under a tree, and in the middle of god knows where. It’s the kind of atmosphere that authors use to write books, this is what Steinbeck lived off. Except it’s not dark, it’s peaceful, and he’s happy. He smiles at Louis, who stares off at the windmill spinning. “I like this.”  
  
  
“Yeah?” Louis asks, but it’s not a question that needs an answer. “I knew you would.”  
  
  
It’s been two and a half weeks since they left Baltimore. Two and a half weeks on the road, and they haven’t gotten lost yet and the weather has been kind to them. Zayn doesn’t know why he was so adamant about not going when Louis first asked. Sure, he’s heard bad stories from his older friends who drove out west, but this is Louis. They might sling insults at each other, but nothing bad would ever happen to them. Not while they’re together, at least. Zayn lights a cigarette, and watches Louis paste his drawing in a scrapbook.  
  
  
~  
  
  
The Rockies are difficult to navigate, and they spend much of their time arguing about who has to drive.

  
  
“I drove over the last mountain range we had to cross.” Louis snaps. “While you spent all the sweet time  _sleeping._ ”  
  
  
Zayn doesn’t think that’s true. He was definitely awake for much off the Appalachians. “I definitely helped, and come on bro, I’m exhausted.”  
  
  
“We could trade off.” Louis suggests. It’s starting to rain, and Louis groans. “Remember when you said the weather is good and we’re lucky? You jinxed it.”  
  
  
Zayn curses to himself. “We’ll wait till it slows down.”  
  
  
Except it doesn’t slow down for a long while – so long, in fact, that they give up for the night. They rent a little cabin in the camp site before the Rockies trail starts. It’s not a lighted cabin so Louis lights the fire place. Zayn strips off his wet shirt and hangs it near the fire place so it can dry, and borrows one of Louis’s shirts since he left his bags in the car.  
  
  
Louis tries cooking their canned foods near the fireplace, and Zayn watches with amusement as he tries to figure out how to operate a can opener. Louis bites his lip, concentrating hard to figure it out,  and maybe it’s because of the dim light of the fire, or maybe it’s how the atmosphere is generally, but Zayn thinks this is the most beautiful Louis has ever looked. Usually hyperactive and wild, these little moments of mellowness from the other man are really something special.  
  
  
Zayn figures he’s staring because Louis turns and looks at him, before asking curiously, “You alright?”  
  
  
“Yeah, fine.” Zayn smiles. Louis scoots over next to him, and hands him the open can, smiling sheepishly. It’s not cooked, but at least it’s opened. Zayn moves the fringe out of Louis’s eyes. “You tried, babe.”  
  
  
They don’t say anything for a moment, before Louis breaks the comfortable silence. “We’re almost in California, you know. Probably another week at most, if we stop often like we are now.”  
  
  
Zayn frowns, slightly. This has been, by far, the best summer of his life. He’s not even sure they’ve done much of anything, except drive and take pictures, but it’s more than enough. Zayn throws an arm around Louis. “I’ll miss this in college.”  
  
  
“College.” Louis says, distantly. As if he hasn’t been thinking about it, and maybe he’s not. Louis has never been one to plan about the future, and he’d much rather go with the flow. “I still think you should have come to NYU with me – Boston isn’t even that great.”  
  
  
Zayn sighs. “New York is too busy, you know?”  
  
  
“Busy is good.” Louis points out, taking a spoon full of whatever beans they tried cooking. “I like busy.”  
  
  
Zayn smiles.  _Of course you do,_ Zayn thinks. “I like slow. Taking things easy, you know?”  
  
  
“Maybe that’s why we’re friends.” Louis tells him, handing him the can.  
  
  
Zayn smiles. “Maybe. You need someone to make sure your stupid shit doesn’t land you in jail or something.”  
  
  
“You love my stupid shit.” Louis laughs. “And besides, you need someone to teach you that lightening up isn’t the worst thing in the world.”  
  
  
Zayn grins, running a hand through his hair. “We fit together or some weird shit like that.”  
  
  
“Careful, Zaynie.” Louis smirks. “I might think you’re in love with me after that last statement.”  
  
  
Zayn shrugs. “Maybe I am.”  
  
  
He means it as a joke, but maybe not really. He  _does_ love Louis because, after all, they’ve been best friends since they were in diapers. But being  _in_ love with Louis is something different – and it’s not something Zayn has thought of before. Not really, anyways. It’s not even a sexuality thing, but more to do with the fact that Louis is his best friend, and there has to be rules about that. Rules he doesn’t know, but they have to exist. It’s a scary thought, but this summer has been the best one he’s had. It’s the kind of summer where he wants to do nothing but spend every moment with Louis, and maybe that’s how he sees the rest of his life too. If this never ends, Zayn would be the happiest man on the planet. But it will end, and they’ll go to college, and maybe they’ll only see each other every few months during their holidays, and maybe they’ll drift apart. And if he is in love with Louis, that would hurt more than he can imagine. So he doesn’t want to think about it.  
  
  
~  
  
  
Louis curls up in the back seat, ipod in his ear and an open book in his lap, sleeping like there’s no tomorrow. Zayn smiles to himself, taking in Louis’s sleeping figure. He understands why route 50 is called the loneliest route now that they’re stretching into Nevada. There hasn’t been a town for more than fifty miles, and all Zayn can see is the desert sand in front of him and the eerily grey skies above. With Louis fast asleep, Zayn grows bored, and pulls over. He leans against the hood of the car, lighting a cigarette, and looking over the map. They’re a few miles from Las Vegas, and Zayn makes a mental note to ask Louis if they can stop there despite their ‘no big cities’ pact. It’s about six hundred miles to San Francisco, and Zayn figures if they don’t stop, it’ll be another day trip.

  
  
But they’ll stop because what’s the fun in not stopping? So far, they’ve stopped at towns that boasted the world’s best pancakes (which was, of course, a lie), the world’s largest stapler (which could be true, but Zayn doesn’t care one way or the other), and America’s most fun ghost town (which was, most certainly, true. Louis even thinks they might have found a real life ghost, which Zayn has to remind him isn’t actually possible.)  
  
  
Zayn hears the car door open and turns. Louis walks up to him, yawning. He pulls on a grey sweatshirt, the sleeves a bit long and the shoulder area tight. Zayn smiles, “Is that mine?”  
  
  
“Yeah.” Louis tells him, voice still rasp from sleep. “It kinda smells like you.”  
  
  
Louis holds up one of his arm, so Zayn can sniff. It smells a little bit like cigarettes and his cologne. It’s a pretty odd combination, Zayn has to admit. He’s just so used to it that he doesn’t even notice. He wonders how Louis puts up with it.  
  
  
Louis sits next to him on the car, and Zayn puts out his cigarette. He looks at Louis, who rolls up the sleeves to the sweatshirt. If there’s a word to describe the action, it’s  _adorable_. Zayn smiles, “Sleep well?”  
  
  
“Mhmm.” Louis murmurs, taking his ipod out and giving Zayn one of the headphones. “How far are we from a town?”  
  
  
Zayn looks at the map again, “Thirty miles. If we start now, we can probably get there by midnight.”  
  
  
“No, it’s okay.” Louis yawns again, running a hand through his hair. “Let’s just stay here for a while.”  
  
  
Zayn looks over at him. “You sure?”  
  
  
“Shut up and enjoy the moment, Zayn.” Louis rolls his eyes. He points towards the desert. “It kinda looks like it goes on forever.”  
  
  
Zayn looks out, and Louis is right. The sand stretches in every direction. “Maybe it does.”  
  
  
Louis throws an arm around Zayn’s shoulder. “I can’t believe it’s almost over.”  
  
  
“I’m going to miss you so much.” Zayn tells him, earnestly. Louis just hums in response. “It’s like – I don’t know if I’ll make it at college without you.”  
  
  
Louis chuckles. “I really am enjoying all these emotional confessions from you, babe.”  
  
  
“Shut up, I’m being serious here.” Zayn rolls his eyes. Louis just grins at him.  
  
  
Zayn thinks about what he wants to say.  _Louis, I need you?_ That sounds drastic.  _My life only feels right while I’m spending every goddam moment with you?_ That’s worse.  _I love you?_ That could be it, but Zayn isn’t sure that’s a confession he wants to make. Not so close to college starting. So, Zayn doesn’t say anything. He’s never been the best with words.  
  
  
Louis sighs after a moment, “I’ll miss you too. This has been the best summer of my life, even beating out the time you got us lost in Epcot.”  
  
  
“That was your fault.” Zayn laughs, leaning back into Louis’s embrace. “We still have a few days till we hit San Fran.”  
  
  
Louis nods, playing with the hair on the back of Zayn’s head. “Let’s make the most of it, huh?”  
  
  
“Completely.”  
  
  
~  
  
  
The town is called Bakersfield. Zayn thinks it’s ridiculous since there’s neither a bakery, nor many places that have edible things to eat, and despite his protests, Louis absolutely refused to go to Las Vegas. His exact quote was  _unless you’re planning on marrying me there, there’s no way we’re hitting a big city since we made a deal._

  
  
Zayn would argue, but once Louis makes up his mind, nobody can say no. Least of all, him.  
  
  
“We could have had proper food in Vegas,” Zayn grumbles, picking at his food. He’s not sure what he ordered but it’s grey and sludgy. “Pizza or chicken, or maybe pasta. But no, you  _had_ to be a fucking hipster with your route.”  
  
  
Louis laughs, taking a sip of his soup. “Quit complaining, I thought you said we’d make the most of the rest of this trip.”  
  
  
“We could have made the most of it in Vegas.” Zayn retorts, using his spoon to take a sip of Louis’s soup. “Hey – your shit tastes better than mine.”  
  
  
“Really?” Louis asks, reaching over to eat some of Zayn’s grey blob. He makes a face, but doesn’t say anything. Zayn laughs because really, that stuff isn’t edible. Louis goes back to his own soup. “I did say we could go to Vegas if we got hitched – my mother would freak out and it would be  _hilarious.”_  
  
  
Zayn rolls his eyes. “Yeah, hilarious. Meanwhile, I’d be stuck with you for the rest of my life.”  
  
  
“Hey, I’m not that bad.” Louis pouts.  
  
  
It’s honestly cute, and Zayn groans. “If I could get better food than this, I might have just proposed to you.”  
  
  
“You’d marry me for food.” Louis muses. “You’d be a hit working the st – hey, what was that for?”  
  
  
Zayn flicks Louis with some of his grey mess. “Finish that sentence and I’ll leave you for dead here.”  
  
  
“You wouldn’t dare.”  
  
  
 _No I wouldn’t,_ Zayn thinks. It’s funny, really, if he actually thinks about it. After eighteen years, Louis manages to unravel each and every one of his quirks. Louis knows just where to push Zayn, and Zayn doesn’t know how to feel about it. On one hand, it’s amazing to have someone know him so well, but on the other, it scares Zayn. Scares him knowing that all Louis needs to do is ask him to do something, and Zayn would probably be on his knees in a heartbeat. Not that Louis would ever ask him to do something he wouldn’t normally do, of course.  
  
  
He wonders if it’s the same the other way around – if Louis feels like that about him. This hopeless need, almost desperation to just be with the other man whenever he can. He wonders if it’s like that for Louis too. Sure Louis might joke around about getting married, or even just being together, but Zayn wonders if it’s the same feeling he has.  
  
  
 _But my heart is taken so the poor guy doesn’t have a chance,_ Louis had once said to him. And maybe he’s in the same position as Belle’s nonexistent brother. He just wonders who it is.  
  
  
~  
  
  
It’s scorching hot as they enter California, even at night. Louis takes over driving from him, as Zayn lounges in the back seat, which after three weeks on the road looks something like a hurricane hitting a grocery store. Zayn is pretty sure he’s sitting on cereal. Louis starts singing along to Creedence Clearwater Revival, and Zayn hums along accordingly.

  
  
They’re less than twenty miles from San Francisco when Louis pulls over. Zayn eyes him curiously, and Louis just gestures him to follow him. There’s a small cliff, overlooking a stream. Louis takes out his polaroid and snaps a picture, which doesn’t come out well, due to there being only a few lights around. He turns to Zayn, “I don’t want to drive to San Francisco tonight.”  
  
  
“Why?” Zayn asks, though he gets the feeling he knows the answer.  
  
  
Louis bites his lip. “Because it ends there. We’ll fly home, then pack for school, and we’ll go to school and I’ll barely see you, and that fucking  _sucks._ ” He pauses a moment before saying, “I don’t know, Zayn. There’s so much I wanted to tell you on this road trip and I didn’t tell you anything.”  
  
  
Zayn studies him for a moment, holding his gaze. “There’s a lot I have to tell you too, but I’ve never been good with words.”  
  
  
“Yeah, good luck studying English then.” Louis laughs, and Zayn glares. “Oh sorry, we’re having a serious moment right now.”  
  
  
Zayn scratches the back of his head. He doesn’t know how to say it, but goes for it anyways. “Lou – I know you like someone from school and that’s  _fine_ , but fuck, this road trip just made me realize that I really need you in my life and I’m not even sure it’s just as a friend anymore.” He pauses, hoping Louis would cut in and say something, but he doesn’t. Zayn meets Louis’s eyes. They look far bluer than Zayn could remember, brighter even. Zayn sighs, “I think what I’m trying to say is that I love you, and I know we’re…”  
  
  
Louis cuts him off by kissing him. “You’re really fucking dense sometimes.”  
  
  
“What.” Zayn blinks.  
  
  
Louis rolls his eyes. “You, Zayn. That guy we were talking about. It was you, it’s always been you. You’ve just been stupid enough to never figure it out.”  
  
  
That’s all Zayn needs to hear. He kisses Louis again, more passionate than the first. It’s needy, desperate, and Zayn never wants to let go.  
  
  
~  
  
  
When they get to San Francisco, they drop the car off at Louis’s father’s. It’s a tense moment, but Louis doesn’t want to talk about it after, and Zayn drops it. If Louis wants to talk about something, he will, and Zayn will be there for him.

  
  
 _It’s weird,_ Zayn thinks. It’s weird how easy it is for them to take the next step, and give a relationship a chance. How easy it is to break the friendship line and end up at so much more. Zayn finds himself randomly smiling whenever Louis hugs him because it’s different now. They’re happier, and maybe university will still cause problems, but at least they’re not going with a lot of things unsaid and a lot of questions unasked. Besides, Zayn is pretty sure neither of them will let the other slip away. Not now, not ever.


End file.
